Eleven days ago I received a text from my girlfriend that would impact the next 10 days of my life.
Her: “I bought something today”
Me: “Is it a spaceship?”
Turns out it was not a spaceship. It was a detox/cleanse book aka “my worst nightmare on”. I would like to say I agreed to do it with nothing but the best intentions and a genuine willingness to try something new, but if we are being honest…it was mostly male ego: I didn’t want her to accomplish something difficult without me.
So, without further adieu, here are the diet details
The first and most important thing is that no sugar of any kind can be consumed during this diet. This includes anything that turns into sugar when entering the body. So what that means is: no gluten, no wheat, no rice, no pasta, no mac and cheese, and no Starbursts. No Starbursts?! That was my own personal hell! You also cannot eat dairy, legumes and certain fruits are also no-no’s. What does that leave us with? Veggies, lean meats (red meat only 1 day out of 10), and nuts. I learned more than I thought was possible about chia and flax seeds, and brazil nuts during this diet. I also discovered that Whole Foods has Pure Almond butter which is pretty much the equivalent of the promised land as far as this detox goes.
Gandhi style: Or how I learned to love the superfoods!: or Day 1
I will admit I wasn’t all in at first. The detox we did called for a super healthy shake for breakfast every morning. The first morning I looked at her shake and everything she put in it and said “I’m going Gandhi style, no food for me.” That was the first of many eyerolls over the next 10 days.
That night she made a delicious salmon dinner along with a side vegetable I’m not sure what they were…for 10 days I was on vegetable overload, somewhere along the way I lost track. I ate more vegetables in this time period that I had in all of 2014 and maybe half of 2013.
I miss beer.
I decided that if I was going to do this thing I was going all in. I made a shake consisting of strawberries, blueberries, chia seed, almond milk, avocado, walnuts, and maybe a couple other things. IT WAS DELICIOUS! I’m making these things a staple of my diet they were so good and most of all good for me. My girlfriend was a cereal girl prior to starting this cleanse but now we are both smoothie addicts, no better way to start the day!
I still miss beer. (are you sensing a theme here?)
I woke up on day 5 and noticed something phenomenal: my knees didn’t hurt. I can’t even remember the last time I woke up without joint pain but it wasn’t anytime in the last couple years. Eating crow is never a good feeling (and most likely not a welcome dietary addition on this cleanse) but I officially was in love with the results. The funny thing is, I am not new to the world of cleansing and detox, I have gone on several before and remember them being amazing and feeling great, but out of sight out of mind. I had gotten back into the habit of eating poorly, and couldn’t remember how good I felt when eating “clean”.
We followed the detox book maybe 50% of the time in terms of the recommended meal. A lot of the time we just made our own amazingly healthy meals that fit into the restrictions perfectly. We made a shrimp stir fry that was absolutely amazing. We liked it so much we made it for a group of friends that weren’t even doing the cleanse and they loved it too! Of course they ate it over rice and drank wine right in front of us but we won’t hold that against them too much. Just kidding, we are never talking to them again…
I had athletic events the last two days of this cleanse and I honestly have never felt better. At 31, that is a really good feeling. And I didn’t even miss beer that much at the end. Just please don’t tell my girlfriend that.
This type of cleanse probably isn’t for everyone. It’s very restrictive and can get a little costly depending on how closely you follow the prescribed meal plan, however, you don’t need to do this cleanse to start feeling good again and honestly you probably don’t need to do it for 10 days to see a lot of the benefits. Try 3 days of just lean meats and veggies and you will see an amazing difference!